Re: Ping: Petem

[JoeRaisin <joeraisin2001@xxxxxxxxx>]

Robert L Bass wrote:
> Mark wrote:
>>
>> Why did he pick petem?  He's not really said a lot against RLB
>>
>> Why not Doug?
>> Alarman?
>> Me?
>
> Random selection.  I was planning to get around to the rest, one at a
> time.  I bear you no ill will, Mark.  We've argued and shot insults back
> and forth for years.  I wish there was a way to back up and start over
> but there isn't.  All I can say is I'm sorry for any wrong I've done.  I
> would very much like to just make peace with all of you though.  Is that
> possible?
>
> Robert

One thing I have found in my meanderings though the ebbs and flows of
life is that even the most sincere effort to make amends often falls
upon deaf ears.

Being rejected, isn't always a reflection of some failing on the part of
the person doing the rejecting.  Some feel that forgiveness is giving
past poor behavior a pass and, to them, that isn't acceptable.

Fair enough from their perspective.

That isn't how I see it.  IMHO, forgiveness is letting go of past
resentments, though the actions are remembered.  As we are fond of
saying in another forum I participate on, "a resentment is me drinking
poison, hoping you die..."

 From my perspective, offering amends is a way of making peace with my
own poor behavior.  I have found that as long as the offer is honestly
extended, the manner in which it is received has only a little effect on
the outcome.  I meant it - and should the person have a change of heart
later on (which has happened) I follow through.

The honest intentions (which is known ONLY to the person extending the
olive branch) has more to do with coming to peace with myself than any
forgiveness I may have garnered from others.  By the same token, amends
offered with less than rigorous honesty doesn't help what you see in the
mirror regardless of any forgiveness from others.

It all boils down to the fact that what I think about myself is far more
important than what others may think of me.