OT: 20 Reasons Not to Go to Law School

[Jim Rojas <jrojas+tech-man.com>]

Interesting reading...enjoy!

Talk is cheap until you hire a lawyer.

Did you hear about the terrorist who hijacked a 747 full of lawyers? He
threatened to release one every hour if his demands weren't met.

Any time a lawyer is seen and not heard, it's a shame to wake him.

If you can't find a lawyer who knows the law, find one who knows the judge.

Attorney: Let me give you my honest opinion.
Client: No, I'm paying for professional advice.

A lawyer is an expert on justice in the same way a prostitute is an
expert on love.

In law school, time is meaningless; but in time, law school is meaningless.

Psychiatrist Frasier Crane:  I hate lawyers.
Psychiatrist Niles Crane:  I do too, but they make wonderful patients.
They have excellent health insurance, and they never get better.

A doctor told his patient that she had only six months to live.
"Isn't there anything I can do?" pleaded the patient.
"Marry a lawyer," the doctor advised. "It will be the longest six months
of your life."


Quoted from:

http://www.associatedcontent.com/article/41815/20_reasons_not_to_go_to_law_school.html

I'm a lawyer.  Here are 20 reasons not to make the same mistake I did.
Here are 20 reasons not to go to law school.

1.  All lawyers are assholes.  A common misconception is that lawyers
become assholes at the swearing in ceremony.  Take it from me, they're
assholes as early as law school orientation.

2.  Law school costs a shitload of money.  Unless your parents flit the
bill, you're gonna be paying back student loans for the next 30 years of
your life.  You may even be writing articles for Associated Content just
to meet your monthly school loan bills.

3.  If you believe you go to school to learn, law school isn't for you.
  Law school isn't for learning, it's for competing against your fellow
classmates.  The same assholes I mentioned in Reason #1.

4.  You learn absolutely nothing practical in law school.  Law school is
meant to help you think like a lawyer, not help you practice law.  There
are no classes entitled Legal Fees 101 or Getting Your Deadbeat Client
to Pay.  You learn that the hard way on your own.

5.  Law school professors are pretentious pricks.  Think of your worst
college professor and multiply his or her conceit by one hundred.
That's your average law school professor.

6.  Law students don't drink nearly as much as college students.  If you
think you're going to law school to continue your partying days, think
again.  Law students aren't fun.  Stay on campus, take graduate courses.

7.  The Juris Doctorate degree is the only Doctorate degree you can earn
and still not be called Doctor.  "Counselor" just sucks, and it's
usually used only by Judges right before they yell at you.

8.  Law students are constantly asked for legal advice even though they
don't know the first damn thing about the law.  You either have to make
something up or look stupid.  Or both.

9.  Final Exams suck.  Your entire semester boils down to two weeks of
tests, one session right before Christmas, one right before summer
break.  Talk about stress.  Who needs that?

10.  Summer Break sucks.  You've got to work to build up your resume
during summer break because all those aforementioned assholes are doing
it and you're competing against them.

11.  Three years is a long time.  The four years of college flew by, but
don't expect the same from the years you're stuck in law school.
Remember, you're surrounded by assholes, you're competing, and no one's
drinking.  Time...moves...slowly.

12.  The pretty girls are mean, the good-looking guys are dorks.

13.  You are told at law school orientation that you cannot sustain a
relationship while you are in law school.  Say goodbye to your mate, and
no, he or she will not be waiting for you over the next three years.

14.  The Bar Exam sucks.  It's two or three days of nonsensical
questions that you will never have to answer again in your career.
You'll study for three months for one damn test, and if you fail (and
40% of you will), you have to do it all over again in six months.  And
you'll look like a dumbass to the asshole friends you made in law school.

15.  If you pass the bar exam, you then have to deal with the State's
Character and Fitness Committee.  If you've led any kind of life, you
have at least one or two skeletons in your closet.  Well, dust them off,
because they're coming out.  And some group of self-righteous assholes
are gonna judge you by them.

16.  The bigger the firm you end up with, likely the more money you'll
make.  The caveat is the bigger the firm you work for, the more assholes
you'll work with.

17.  Practicing law isn't a 9 to 5 gig.  You work long hours.  With
those aforementioned assholes.  Nuff said.

18.  Lawyer jokes.  Yeah, they were funny when you first heard them.
But they get old real fast.

19.  Most Judges are none too swift.  And you have to kiss their ass
right through their black robes.  I mean, really these Judges have to
take a pay cut to drape themselves in black and sit on a perch.  How
much fun can they be?

20.  The best reason not to go to law school and not to become a lawyer
is this:  CLIENTS.  Clients ruin the practice of law.  They are often
imbecilic tormentors who tell you time and time again, "You work for
me."  They know nothing about the law, but they wanna run the show.  And
worst of all, they don't like to pay their bills.