Re: OT: Murder at Safeway

[Jim <alarminex@xxxxxxx>]

On Mar 11, 10:13=EF=BF=BDam, Frank Olson <use-the-email-
li...@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx> wrote:
>
> "ARTIE CHOKES 2 FOR $1.00 AT SAFEWAY!"

Back in days of old, there was a man by the name of Fred, who had a
new idea to make some money. He would grow and sell flowers. People
who lived in the country could get all the flowers they wanted but in
the city, he thought it would be easier for people to buy them.

He had a great busines going for about a year, when the Friars at the
local monastery decided that since they had nothing to do all day but
pray and tend to their vegetable garden, that it would be easy for
them to grow flowers too and make some money at the same time. Of
course, because of their low overhead, they sold them at a much lower
price than Fred could. Fred's business began to suffer so he went to
the Friars and asked if they would raise their prices a little which
would gain them more money and would keep the competition on a more
even basis. They refused, saying that that would be cheating the
public.

Fred went to the local Pub and was lamenting over having to close his
business when Hugh McTaggart, the town strongman, overheard what the
Friars had done.  So Hugh took it upon himself to go to the Friars
flower stand and ask them to ease up on his friend Fred. The Friars
refused, so Hugh picked up the two Friars, threw them out on the
street and proceded to destroy their flower stand, tearing it to
shreds, leaving nothing behind except a warning that he'd be back if
he found out they'd opened up again.

To this day, these events  have resounded down through history and
come to us today in the old saying:

Hugh and only Hugh, can prevent florist Friars.