OT: The final urban legend...

["Mark Harrison" <Mark.Harrison@xxxxxxx>]

I know this guy whose neighbor, a young man, was home recovering from
finding a rat in his bucket of Kentucky Fried Chicken. One day he went to
sleep, and when he awoke he was in his bathtub, and it was full of ice, and
he was sore all over. When he got out of the tub he realized that his
kidneys had been stolen and he saw a note on his mirror that said
"Call 911!" 

But he was afraid to use his phone, because it was connected to his
computer, and there was a virus on the WWW that would destroy his hard
drive if he opened an e-mail entitled "Good Times!" 

He knew it wasn't a hoax because he himself was a computer programmer who
was working on software to save us from Armageddon when the year 2000 rolls
around. His program will prevent a global disaster in which all the
computers get together and distribute the $250 Neiman Marcus cookie recipe
under the leadership of Bill Gates. (It's true -- I read it all last week
in a mass e-mail from Bill Gates himself, who was also promising me a free
Disney World vacation and $5,000 if I would forward the e-mail to everyone
I know.) 

The poor man then tried to call 911 from a pay phone to report his missing
kidneys, but reaching into the coin return slot he got jabbed with an HIV
infected needle around which was wrapped a note that said, "Welcome to
the world of AIDS." 

Luckily he was only a few blocks from the hospital. The same one, in fact,
where that little boy who is dying of cancer is, the one whose last wish is
for everyone in the world to send him an e-mail and the American Cancer
Society has agreed to pay him a nickel for every e-mail he receives. 

I sent him two emails and one of them was a bunch of x's and o's in the
shape of an angel (if you get it and forward it to twenty people you will
have good luck, if you only send it to ten people you will only have OK
luck, and if you send it to less than ten people you will have bad luck for
seven years). 

So anyway the poor guy tried to drive himself to the hospital, but on the
way he noticed another car driving along without his lights on. To be
helpful, he flashed his lights at him and was promptly shot as part of a
gang initiation. 

And it's a little-known fact that the Y1K problem caused the Dark Ages.


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