[WILDLY OT] FW: The search for Claire Swires

[Ian Lowe <ian@xxxxxxx>]

With sincere apologies if anyone is offended, however, this is one of
those priceless moments of 'Net legend in the making!!

Ian.

> From: Jennifer Lowe <jennifer.lowe@xxxxxxx>
> To: "'humour@xxxxxxx'" <humour@xxxxxxx>
> Subject: FW: The search for Claire Swires
> Date: Thu, 14 Dec 2000 09:32:37 -0000
>
> I wouldn't normally send on things like this, at first glance
> it looks like a chain mail, but, go down to the bottom, read
> the joke that we have all seen before, then move your way up,
> I have cut out the last few "FW:" messages as they are all
pretty
> much the same, but, what a shame for the poor girl.......
>
> *grin*
>
> Jenni
>
> > > > > -----Original Message-----
> > > > > From: Baker Miranda MAB
> > > > > Sent: Monday, 11 December 2000 10:05
> > > > > To: Nicholson Alex amn; Cantell Melissa MEJC; Max
Shoshana
> shdm;
> > > Tinkler
> > >
> > > > > Vanessa VLT
> > > > > Subject: FW:
> > > > >
> > > > >
> > > > > oh dear this poor girl - why some things should
not be sent
> in an
> > > email...
> > > >
> > > > >
> > > > > -----Original Message-----
> > > > > From: King, Matt MQK
> > > > > Sent: Monday, 11 December 2000 9:21
> > > > > To: Martin, Simon SNM; Meyer Matthew MQM; Rumball
Rachel RUM;
> Osborne
> > > > > Matthew MJO; Baker Miranda MAB
> > > > > Subject: FW:
> > > > >
> > > > >
> > > Start at bottom with the joke and then check out the
confession
> from
> > > Claire  Swires. This has gone all over London. Now let's
make it
> NZ.
> > > > >
> > > > > -----Original Message-----
> > > > > From: Sarch, Patrick [ mailto:sarchpaj@xxxxxxx
> > > > ]
> > > > > Sent: Saturday, 9 December 2000 5:58
> > > > > To: 'Anthony'; 'Claydude'; 'Collins'; 'Cro
Magnon'; 'Jah
> Otis';
> > > > > 'Jezzer'; 'Kev@UBS'; 'kingy'; 'ninja'; 'Nuria';
'Putters';
> 'rich';
> > > > > 'Slash'; 'tazza'; 'Trev'; 'zac'
> > > > > Subject: FW:
> > >
> > > check this out - worth the effort...start at the bottom
> > > Norton Rose is a ruthless place to be
> > > > >
> > > > > -----Original Message-----
> > > > > From: Stephens, Sarah
> > > > > Sent: Friday, December 08, 2000 4:48 PM
> > > > > To: Sarch, Patrick
> > > > > Subject: FW:
> > > > >
> > > > >
> > > > >
> > > > >
> > > > > -----Original Message-----
> > > > > From: Alison Bunting [ mailto:Alison.Bunting@xxxxxxx
> > > > ]
> > > > > Sent: 08 December 2000 16:25
> > > > > To: Stephens, Sarah
> > > > > Subject: FW:
> > > > >
> > > > >
> > > > >
> > > > >
> > > > > -----Original Message-----
> > > > > From: Jonathan Parry
> > > > > Sent: 08 December 2000 16:12
> > > > > To: Alison Bunting
> > > > > Subject: FW:
> > > > >
> > > > >
> > > > >
> > > > >
> > > > > -----Original Message-----
> > > > > From: Jonathan Parry
> > > > > Sent: 08 December 2000 16:10
> > > > > To: James Broadhurst; Brigit Hanwell; Adrian D
Elliott; Angus
> Dodwell;
> > >
> > > > > Lilimarlen Hoff; Shona Power; Georgina McNeil;
Nicholas Lees;
> Georgina
> > >
> > > > > Harris; Mary Gatehouse
> > > > > Subject:
> > >
> > > Watch what you confess in your e-mails. Scroll down read the
joke
> > > followed
> > > by "Claire Swires'" frank confession (which is now
being thrown
> all over
> > > the information super-highway). Anyone ever heard of her?
> > > > >
> > > > > -----Original Message-----
> > > > > From: Nick Jefferson
> > > > > Sent: 08 December 2000 15:38
> > > > > To: Nicholas Attwell; James Trafford; Ian Warner;
Jonathan
> Parry;
> > > Martin
> > >
> > > > > Bavinton
> > > > > Subject: FW: Where is Claire Squires?
> > > > >
> > > > >
> > > > >
> > > > >
> > > > > -----Original Message-----
> > > > > From: Paul Armstrong
> > > > > Sent: 08 December 2000 15:38
> > > > > To: Frank Thianer; Sofia de Meyer; Bradley Kidd;
Nick
> Jefferson
> > > > > Subject: FW: Where is Claire Squires?
> > > > >
> > > > >
> > > > >
> > > Read the jokes and then scroll up to see the unfortunate
response
> from
> > > claire swires and begin the hunt to return the Email to it's
> owner
> > > > >
> > > > > -----Original Message-----
> > > > > From: Paul Hinton [ mailto:paul.hinton@xxxxxxx
> > > > ]
> > > > > Sent: 08 December 2000 14:12
> > > > > To: 'Erik.frisch@xxxxxxx'; 'Tony_Norris@xxxxxxx';
> > > > > 'russ.coff@xxxxxxx'
> > > > > Subject: FW: "yours was yum"
> > >
> > > Read the jokes and then scroll up to see the unfoirtunate
> response from
> > > claire swires and begin the hunt to return the Email to it's
> owner
> > >
> > > -----Original Message-----
> > > From: Poole, Charlotte [SMTP:CLP@xxxxxxx]
> > > Sent: Friday, December 08, 2000 2:09 PM
> > > To: Secondment - Paul Hinton
> > > Subject: FW: "yours was yum"
> > >
> > > amusing scroll down
> > >
> > >  -----Original Message-----
> > > From: Malhotra, Samidha [ mailto:samidha.malhotra@xxxxxxx
]
> > > Sent: Friday, December 08, 2000 1:55 PM
> > > To: Hudson, Toby; 'clp@xxxxxxx'; 'sophiec@xxxxxxx';
> > > 'marie.smith@xxxxxxx';
> > > 'louise.buczkiewicz@xxxxxxx'; 'stephen.a.reid@xxxxxxx';
> > > 'rachel.andrews@xxxxxxx';
> > > 'sarah.dinneen@xxxxxxx'
> > > Subject: FW: "yours was yum"
> > >
> > > I know its mean, but v funny...poor girl!!
> > >
> > >  -----Original Message-----
> > > From: David.Clark@xxxxxxx
> > >  [SMTP:David.Clark@xxxxxxx]
> > > Sent: 08 December 2000 11:26
> > > To: awj4255@xxxxxxx; atif.karim@xxxxxxx;
> > > cwarrendickins@xxxxxxx; fiona.patten@xxxxxxx;
> > > R.Crouch@xxxxxxx; SAdat78697@xxxxxxx;
> > > samidha.malhotra@xxxxxxx;
> > >
> > > Tim.Crocker@xxxxxxx;
> Susan.Blatchford@xxxxxxx
> > > Subject: FW: "yours was yum"
> > >
> > > scroll - the jokes are at the very bottom, but the real
value is
> the
> > > e-mails from Ms. Swire a bit further up
> > >
> > >  -----Original Message-----
> > >  From: Nicholas.Coddington@xxxxxxx
> > > [ mailto:Nicholas.Coddington@xxxxxxx
]
> > > Sent: 07 December 2000 17:22
> > > To: David.Downward@xxxxxxx; RobF@xxxxxxx;
> > > david.clark@xxxxxxx; garcia_felipe@xxxxxxx;
> > > Roundboy_8@xxxxxxx; George.Knighton@xxxxxxx;
> > > james.caterer@xxxxxxx; rtyler@xxxxxxx;
> > > PJH@xxxxxxx;
> > > stephfullagar@xxxxxxx; Stephen.Thomas@xxxxxxx
> > > Subject: FW: "yours was yum"
> > >
> > > This is good.
> > > It's Loreal, but I'm worth it
> > >
> > > -----Original Message-----
> > > From: Marshall, Joanna (TR)
> > > Sent: Thursday, December 07, 2000 6:16 PM
> > > To: Williams, Tom; Whitelock, Ben; Raman, Krishna; Strang,
Emma;
> > > Bennett, Clare: (NY); Klimes, Adam: (PG); Ainger, Luke:
(BR);
> > > Turrell,
> > > Ben:ICM (PA); Cantwell, Sarah; Jones, Bronwen; Perinparaja,
> > > Anjali:LT
> > >  (LN); Bower, Nicholas:PG (LN); Coddington, Nicholas: (WR);
> Daykin,
> > > Susie: (BD); Haddon, Imogen (ML); Manisty, Victoria: (RM);
> Watson,
> > > Davina
> > > Subject: FW: "yours was yum"
> > >
> > > This has apparently been going round Norton Rose. Very
funny!
> > >
> > > -----Original Message-----
> > >  From: Ferri, David [ mailto:ferridg@xxxxxxx ]
> > >  Sent: Thursday, December 07, 2000 6:07 PM
> > > To: 'nick scouser'; 'nick roth'; 'alex'; 'rick'; 'joanna';
'bec';
> > > 'crispin'
> > > Subject: FW: "yours was yum"
> > >
> > > one of the best emails i've seen in yonks!!
> > >  HUNT HER DOWN!!!!!!!!!!!!
> > >
> > > -----Original Message-----
> > >  From: Falkner, Claire
> > > Sent: 07 December 2000 19:56
> > > To: Hames, Joel; Ferri, David; Drummond, Edward; Driver,
Robert;
> > > Walker,
> > > Steven; Murray, Grant; Knight, Peter; Newby, Chris; Moss,
Jason
> > > Cc: Banner, Heather; Boxer, Sonya; Williamson, Emma
> > > Subject: RE: "yours was yum"
> > >
> > > and she just doesn't look like that type of girl - you can't
> trust
> anyone,
> > > can you?
> > >
> > >  -----Original Message-----
> > > From: Hames, Joel
> > > Sent: 07 December 2000 16:55
> > > To: Ferri, David; Falkner, Claire; Drummond, Edward; Driver,
> Robert;
> > > Walker, Steven; Murray, Grant; Knight, Peter; Newby, Chris;
Moss,
> > > Jason
> > > Cc: Banner, Heather; Boxer, Sonya; Williamson, Emma
> > > Subject: RE: "yours was yum"
> > >
> > >
>
http://www.google.com/search?q=cache:community.icollector.com/++%22claire+
> > >
> > >
> > >  sw
> > > ire%22&hl=en
> > > found her
> > >
> > > -----Original Message-----
> > > From: Ferri, David
> > > Sent: 07 December 2000 16:50
> > > To: Falkner, Claire; Drummond, Edward; Driver, Robert;
Hames,
> Joel;
> > > Walker, Steven; Murray, Grant; Knight, Peter; Newby, Chris;
Moss,
> > > Jason
> > > Cc: Banner, Heather; Boxer, Sonya; Williamson, Emma
> > > Subject: RE: "yours was yum"
> > >
> > > what a top lass let's start a campaign to find her
> > >
> > > -----Original Message-----
> > > From: Falkner, Claire
> > > Sent: 07 December 2000 19:35
> > > To: Drummond, Edward; Driver, Robert; Hames, Joel; Walker,
> Steven;
> > > Murray, Grant; Knight, Peter; Ferri, David; Newby, Chris;
Moss,
> > > Jason
> > > Cc: Banner, Heather; Boxer, Sonya; Williamson, Emma
> > > Subject: RE: "yours was yum"
> > >
> > > just found the same thing - still, how many swires are there
in
> this
> city?
> > >
> > >
> > > -----Original Message-----
> > > From: Drummond, Edward
> > > Sent: 07 December 2000 16:34
> > > To: Falkner, Claire; Driver, Robert; Hames, Joel; Walker,
Steven;
> > > Murray, Grant; Knight, Peter; Ferri, David; Newby, Chris;
Moss,
> Jason
> > > Cc: Banner, Heather; Boxer, Sonya; Williamson, Emma
> > >  Subject: RE: "yours was yum"
> > >
> > > she isn't NR actually now I've looked for her name on
internal
> > > directory.
> > > So we don't know her email address.
> > >
> > >  -----Original Message-----
> > > From: Falkner, Claire
> > > Sent: 07 December 2000 16:33
> > > To: Drummond, Edward; Driver, Robert; Hames, Joel; Walker,
> Steven;
> > > Murray, Grant; Knight, Peter; Ferri, David; Newby, Chris;
Moss,
> > > Jason
> > > Cc: Banner, Heather; Boxer, Sonya; Williamson, Emma
> > > Subject: RE: "yours was yum"
> > >
> > > has anyone else been tempted to forward this back to her?
> > >
> > > -----Original Message-----
> > > From: Drummond, Edward
> > > Sent: 07 December 2000 16:31
> > > To: Driver, Robert; Hames, Joel; Walker, Steven; Murray,
Grant;
> > >  Knight,
> > > Peter; Ferri, David; Newby, Chris; Moss, Jason
> > > Cc: Banner, Heather; Boxer, Sonya; Williamson, Emma;
Falkner,
> Claire
> > >
> > > Subject: RE: "yours was yum"
> > >
> > > they are all NR
> > >
> > >  -----Original Message-----
> > > From: Driver, Robert
> > > Sent: 07 December 2000 16:31
> > > To: Drummond, Edward; Hames, Joel; Walker, Steven; Murray,
Grant;
> > > Knight, Peter; Ferri, David; Newby, Chris; Moss, Jason
> > > Cc: Banner, Heather; Boxer, Sonya; Williamson, Emma;
Falkner,
> Claire
> > >
> > > Subject: RE: "yours was yum"
> > >
> > > who are these people? do they work at NR
> > >
> > > -----Original Message-----
> > > From: Drummond, Edward
> > > Sent: 07 December 2000 16:28
> > > To: Hames, Joel; Walker, Steven; Murray, Grant; Driver,
Robert;
> > > Knight,
> > > Peter; Ferri, David; Newby, Chris; Moss, Jason
> > > Cc: Banner, Heather; Boxer, Sonya; Williamson, Emma;
Falkner,
> Claire
> > >
> > > Subject: FW: "yours was yum"
> > >
> > > beggars belief. I feel honour bound to circulate this.
> > >
> > > -----Original Message-----
> > > From: Chait, Bradley
> > > Sent: 07 December 2000 16:25
> > > To: Tarbuck, Andrew; Caffarate, Nick; Townsend, Nathan;
> McDougall,
> > > Jamie; Davies, Stuart; Drummond, Edward
> > > Subject: "yours was yum"
> > >
> > >
> > > now THAT'S a nice compliment from a lass, isn't it?
> > >
> > > -----Original Message-----
> > >  From: Claire Swire
> > > Sent: 07 December 2000 16:12
> > > To: Chait, Bradley
> > > Subject: RE:
> > >
> > > I hadn't swallowed for years but yours was yum and very good
for
> me too!
> > > Apparently it's very good conditioner for your hair
too...getting
> a
> funny
> > > picture in my head, giggling out loud and now having to
explain
> to Dave
> > > what's so funny!
> > >
> > > -----Original Message-----
> > > From: Chait, Bradley [ mailto:chaitb@xxxxxxx
> > > ]
> > > Sent: 07 December 2000 16:10
> > > To: 'Claire Swire'
> > > Subject: RE:
> > >
> > > Not ALL the time I hope
> > > (or so you would have me believe)
> > >
> > > From: Claire Swire
> > > Sent: 07 December 2000 16:07
> > > To: Chait, Bradley
> > > Subject: RE:
> > >
> > >
> > > lucky I swallow so that wont be happening to me!
> > >
> > > -----Original Message-----
> > > From: Chait, Bradley [ mailto:chaitb@xxxxxxx
> > > Sent: 07 December 2000 16:06
> > > To: 'Claire Swire'
> > > Subject: RE:
> > >
> > > cute
> > >
> > > -----Original Message-----
> > > From: Claire Swire
> > > Sent: 07 December 2000 15:53
> > > To: Adrian James (E-mail); Benny Shipley (E-mail); Chait,
> Bradley;
> > > Caroline
> > > Scotson (E-mail); Chris May (E-mail); Ellie Thorneycroft
> (E-mail); Mark
> > > de st croix (E-mail); Matt Metos (E-mail); Pete Kenyon
(E-mail);
> Toby
> > > Clarke (E-mail)
> > >
> > > Subject:
> > >
> > > A guy walks into a sperm donor bank wearing a ski mask and
> holding a
> > > gun. He goes up to the nurse and demands her to open the
sperm
> bank
> > > vault. She says "But sir, its just a sperm bank!",
"I don't care,
> > > open it now!!!" he replies. So she opens the door to
the vault
> and
> inside
> > > are all the sperm samples. The guy says "Take one of
those sperm
> samples
> > > and
> > > drink it!", she looks at him "BUT, they are sperm
samples???" ,
> "DO
> IT!".
> > > So the nurse sucks it back. "That one there, drink that
one as
> > > well.", so the nurse drinks that one as well. Finally
after 4
> samples
> the
> > > man takes off his ski mask and says, "See honey - its
not that
> hard."
> > >
> > >
> > > > >
> ********************************************************************
>
>
>


=====
>+++
Ian R Lowe. Director, Wintermute Consultancy Ltd.
e-mail: ian@xxxxxxx
Onward and Upward! Towards Ascension!

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